When my oldest son started PreK4, it was the first time that he was at a school where I would not also be there.
It was harder on me than it was on him.
By this time, our bedtime routine was also getting harder. Making sure that I tucked in both boys, and listen to their stories from the day…or whatever they wanted to tell me…on top of bathtime, and brushing teeth…made for a verrry long bedtime routine. So, I was looking for ways to make our routine shorter. I started singing to them and stopped asking about their day at bedtime…and started asking about their day in the car.
For 2-3 years, it got increasingly harder to get my oldest to talk to me…about anything. This little 4-7 year old.
Then, I remembered an article I had read a couple of years before.
It talked about instead of asking “How was your day? What did you learn today?”
To ask this list of other questions.
So…I did that. For months, it felt like pulling teeth, getting him to talk to me.
He is a car rider, so every day, when he got in the car, I’d ask him “What was your favorite part of your day?”
Then, one day…I purposefully didn’t ask. He would screech, cry, not want to answer…so, one day…I just let it be…
(In a whiny voice) “Mom. You forgot to ask me about my day!”
We were half way home.
“No, son. Every day, you get upset with me when I ask…so, today I decided to take a break. Do you want to tell me about your day?”
“Ok. What was your favorite part of your day?”
That day unlocked a little piece of his heart.
He needed to know that I cared about his day, and he had grown accustomed to me asking.
So, for three years, every day, in the car, I’d ask. Some days, I’d get an answer. Some days, I’d get the dreaded screeches and whining. But, most days our car convos would branch into other things he would want to talk to me about.
Then we moved schools. And that felt like another unlocking moment. He loved where he was at, and he was a completely different kid.
Now, I greet him and his brother, every afternoon with “What was your favorite part of today?”
They love it. It’s something that has brought them closer. And it even gets them talking about their day to each other…
I just have to make sure they have a snack, first….because, you know….#hangry runs in the family.