Growth in life

Posted on by rootedmama

I’ve been contemplating lately on change and growth, and I have to keep reminding myself. . . So, naturally, I felt led to share.

Growth in your life, no matter the area, requires a few things:

* Getting out of your own way

* Overcoming obstacles

* Setting goals, yet being flexible on the time line- it’s also important to remember that it’s ok to set a goal down, and pick it back up later!

* Being honest with yourself

Growth takes change, and if you’re not ready to change- you’re not ready to grow.

So, if you’re feeling “stuck” in a certain area of your life- you might ask yourself a question!

Am I ok with staying where I’m at?! Or, do I want to do the work to change what is no longer benefiting me?!

For me, I know it’s time to start doing the work on some things I’ve been avoiding. Know that if you’re there, too- you’ve got this. It’ll be hard, but it’ll be worth it!

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A little encouragement:

Posted on by rootedmama

Some days are hard.

You might feel the tension of wanting to get past a certain obstacle, once-and-for-all.

You might feel like you just don’t have the energy.

You might feel like you’re.just.done.

You keep pressing forward, and put one foot in front of the other.

Then, the tides turn.

You realize that the things you have prayed, wished, hoped, and longed for- they are beginning to unfold.

All the things that didn’t make sense before are beginning to make sense, now.

Y’all know that I’m BIG on sharing what I’m going through in the hopes that it helps someone. That if someone else relates, or gets hope from it- than it’s important to share!

Today, I realized, that so many things I’ve prayed for over the last 10 years have begun to come to tuition- even if they didn’t look the way I intended- or according to my plan.

Today, I want to encourage you- if you are there, in the deep of it all.

If you can barely see what’s ahead of you.

If you are barely surviving- and holding on. . . Keep on keeping on.

Keep fighting.

Keep pushing forward- because- if you pursue the things that are on your heart.

Man, things will look different.

I can promise you the timeline. That’ll look different for each and every person. It’ll depend on how much of the work you put in- but, man. . .

Where you see darkness, now- you’ll see the light and beauty, later!

Keep holding on! Keep fighting. Keep making changes!

Growth in life

Posted on by rootedmama

I’ve been contemplating lately on change and growth, and I have to keep reminding myself. . . So, naturally, I felt led to share.

Growth in your life, no matter the area, requires a few things:

* Getting out of your own way

* Overcoming obstacles

* Setting goals, yet being flexible on the time line- it’s also important to remember that it’s ok to set a goal down, and pick it back up later!

* Being honest with yourself

Growth takes change, and if you’re not ready to change- you’re not ready to grow.

So, if you’re feeling “stuck” in a certain area of your life- you might ask yourself a question!

Am I ok with staying where I’m at?! Or, do I want to do the work to change what is no longer benefiting me?!

For me, I know it’s time to start doing the work on some things I’ve been avoiding. Know that if you’re there, too- you’ve got this. It’ll be hard, but it’ll be worth it!

What’s Even the Point?

Posted on by rootedmama

What’s even the point?

I find myself thinking this on a daily basis.

I’ve poured myself- given all that I can: mentally, physically, emotionally…I’m sure the list goes on..into a lot of aspects of my life over the years.

And, it currently feels like some of it was for nothing.

Don’t get me wrong- there have been a lot of positives, and a lot of growth.

And I probably need to do a journal to process through things…but I still can’t get the thought out of my head: What’s the point?

What was the point of x,y,z circumstance if x,y,z door was closed, or x, y, z growth didn’t happen. You get the picture.

Honestly, the only answer I have right now is that there is a season for everything. I may never know the reason why I’m feeling this way currently. Or maybe, I’m feeling this way and I just need to get out of my own head.

I also know that, if I’m feeling this way- there is probably somebody else out there feeling this way too.

I’ve always been a big believer in sharing what I have gone through, or am currently going through so others know they aren’t alone.

I know that things may seem hopeless or frustrating. But know, that you.are.not.alone.

In case this is just an: I need to get out of my own head moment. . . Here’s what I plan to do-

*Journal

*Talk about it- sometimes just talking through it helps me to process in a different way. And getting it off my chest helps me to let it go.

* Write to share (here)

*Pray about it and seek God

Feel free to join me! Or ask a friend, therapist/counselor/ professional or google and find your own ways to work through it!!

It’s all about creating your toolbox of resources!

One Thing: Education/self development

Posted on by rootedmama

Background:

After exiting teaching full time, shifting to part-time teaching, and entering the Network Marketing business…I was immersed in self-development.right.when.I.needed.it.

My heart was vulnerable. I was open to change. I dove in.

There are road blocks, every now and again…but you take the time to do the heart work, and move forward.

So, what did the process look like?

*Again, this is an area I have yet to fully develop, or set a solid foundation for. So, it’s a growth area.

* I went to (physically and virtually) all the trainings. I read all the books. I took all the notes.

*I prayed, read my bible. And the funny thing is, all the self-development crossed over with my stages I was walking with Jesus.

* Do the heart work.

* take all the notes (usually in the book)

* Now that I have to rely on making myself step up to the plate, my two ways of diving in to education and self-development: reading and listening to podcasts. Because that’s easiest at the moment.

Why do I invest in self-development, you might ask?

Easy. Growth. If I don’t have a growth mindset, I’ll be stuck right where I am. I don’t want to always be stuck right where I am. I always want to be moving forward. Every now and again, I get in a comfy spot…but it doesn’t usually last long…and when I start getting restless…I dive back in!

Why do I invest my time in education and what do I mean by education?

By education, I just mean that I take the time to read or find another way to learn about something I am passionate about.

My favorite college professor taught me what it means to be a lifelong learner. So, that love of learning has spilled over into my life after college. So, I’m trying to always learn about something:

-parenting

-how to be a follower of Jesus

-what I want my role as a mom and wife to look like

-what kind of friend I want to be

-anything science

-history, too

-teaching and education

-health and wellness/ exercise and nutrition

-photography

-Psychology and Mental Health

So, I find books, podcasts and articles over these topics and learn what I can about them.

Again…just one thing at a time.

You kind of just naturally learn about the things you are currently interested in. If you don’t have an interest in something, today, that you did yesterday, put that book down. You’ll come back to it, and if you don’t that’s ok! Pick a book (or article, or documentary, or podcast…you get the picture) that you’re excited to learn about today.

One thing: Cleaning and organizing

Posted on by rootedmama

Cleaning and Organizing.

This has been an area that has been hard to come back from.

Background:

I love cleaning. When I am stressed (you know..the good kind), getting everything into order feels great. I love it. I love everything looking nice and neat and having its place….it gives me peace.

When I moved out of my parent’s house at 20…21…I didn’t have much. I had some paper stuff I needed to go through, but I always had the mindset that I’ll do it later when I have time. (Insert shocked face emoji). Newsflash….you will never just have the time…you have to MAKE the time. Remember how I said that in my early to mid twenties I woke up, ate, went to work, school, and slept. There were life events thrown in there, too. Getting married, having kids, spending time with family, friends. Doing things to be busy. All the things, and avoiding all the papers I had to go through. We kept so busy that while I lived in my apartment by myself, my house was a constant mess, and I didn’t make the time to create habits early on. Yikes. That’s ok, though. I’ve learned since then….

Jump ahead to that time of deep anxiety and some depression. All that paper stuff I didn’t take the time to go through and organize and get rid of when I was living by myself got combined with my husband’s stuff when we got married. When we first got married, we lived in a tiiiny one bedroom apartment, and all of the stuff that needed to be organized got stuffed in this one tiny area. We were both still in school. Newly married, and becoming new parents. So, guess what happened? Yup, all our high school and childhood stuff got combined together, and now we were adding more stuff when we welcomed our new sweet baby. Because I never made myself create the habit of going through it….it all just kept growing. And growing. As we moved into our house, and added another kid…it kept growing. I would start organizing it, and that’s when I started working full time as a teacher. My husband was in his second or third year teaching, I was beginning my first year teaching. We were also having our 2nd baby. Now we had two kids 2 and under. With that followed my husband breaking his leg, and it made the perfect storm for a tough year. It’s when all of the things started falling apart. And that meant I didn’t have the energy anymore to do all the things. Including the house work.

Up until that part, I was basically doing all the house work on my own. Not all, but a big majority of it. That’s because while I was working part time, I had the ability and the space to do a lot of the work myself. It was annoying at times, but I had the time and energy, so I did it.

Side note: My husband has said on occasion, that he feels like he is doing all the work. He has felt just as I have. In reality, it’s all about perspective. Each one of our perspectives have felt true to us. The most important part is communicating that and then finding a common ground, leaving each other room and space to grow.

When I started working full time, I just couldn’t handle it anymore with all of the other added stress, so I slowly started letting things go. I didn’t have the energy to care about things being cleaned to my extremely high standards. So, a lot didn’t get done. And things just piled up. And I didn’t realize how bad it had gotten until my husband broke his leg. While we were in the hospital my family came over and cleaned the house for us, and that’s when I realized I need to get back to where I was. I just didn’t realize how long it would take.

The one thing that was the key….I had to let go of control. As my husband healed from his surgery, I had to allows myself to break down. All of the anxiety and depression from other circumstances had taken a toll, and I needed to deal with it. I had to learn how to take care of myself, and allow my husband space to do things around the house without my nagging. Granted, maybe I shouldn’t have to ask over and over again….but I also could have handled it differently.

This is the process I went through to build back up. And honestly, I am still climbing out of that hole. I have gotten back to cleaning specific areas daily, weekly, and monthly. But, I’m also having to go through 10+ years of junk that I didn’t have the energy or time to go through. Here’s the process:

*Let go of control. Allow my husband and kids the space to contribute on their time and terms. This one is hard. I struggle with it every day, still. It also means learning how to be ok with your home not looking to your standards daily, and learning to know when to say enough is enough. Eventually, your family will feel it, too and they will know that they love your home to look peaceful.

*Pick one chore that I can do. Likely, the first one will be one that has to be done. My mind says…I don’t know about alll of those other things, but this one has to be done and I can do it.

* Day in, day out. Make that chore a habit. Until it becomes something you just do. Now, look up. Look around. Look up. That’s when I tend to notice the next thing that causes the most tension, and then get to work on adding in that chore into the routine. Day in, day out.

*Repeat. There have been times where energy is low. I get used to doing most everything, again. Or just because I have time, I do it all myself. I just have to remind myself to go through the process of allowing and encouraging my family that this is a team effort, and adding new projects to my routine.

If you’re thinking “how can I ever do this?” Trust me. You can. Take it moment by moment. Breathe by breathe. Day by Day. Eventually, you will be able to see past your current storm. You’re building perseverance and resilience. You’ve got this.

Much Love.

Rooted Mama.

“One Thing” Let’s set the background…

Posted on by rootedmama

Let me set the background for you on the 8 topics that I chose for this “One Thing” series…..

Over the past 10 years, I’ve gone from living life with no passion, purpose, or reason to hitting what I call my “Rock Bottom” period, to coming out the other side, to beginning to thrive. In all of these areas, I have great passion. In all of these areas, I have hit a stage of tension, realizing that what I’m looking for is growth in that particular area. I wouldn’t consider myself an expert, but I would say that I have gained some wisdom.

As I share tips and tricks, I have three groups of people in mind.

Group 1- You are in a season of “Rock Bottom”. You look around and you can barely breathe, your head is barely above water…and you don’t see a way out. Friend. I want you to know, that you are not alone. This season does not last forever. And you can slowly climb out of it, and you don’t have to do it alone. You can do it with loving people surrounding you. There are actions you will have to make. Do. Not. Give. Up. Keep going.

My prayer is that by sharing these following posts, that they can be one of many resources to you. Resources that will act like a hand reaching out and pulling you up. We can not get out of these situations alone. Use these posts as one starting place to begin climbing UP. You will likely have many starting places. View these posts as hope. Hope that this season will not be forever. You will see that other people have been where you are, and they go before you-sharing how they got to where they are now.

Group 2- You are right where I currently am sitting. You are in the season of beginning to thrive. You were in a dark place. The fog has cleared. You are beginning to see how the things you have been hoping and praying for are slowly coming together. You’ve worked through a lot of stuff. You still have a lot of growth to do (little secret…you have a lot of growth to do at every season of life), and you are likely no longer beating yourself up over every.little.thing.

My prayer is that by sharing these following posts, you will know that you are not in this season alone. You have someone walking in this current season with you.

Group 3- You are in a season of thriving, in a TON of areas in your life. It is unlikely that you will cross this page. And if you do, that moment will be incredibly humbling. You have figured out things that most of us are still trying to figure out. You have incredible wisdom, and you got there by hustling, working smart, and letting other people pour into you. Now, you are pouring into other people. You know that in reality, every stage and season of life you have to dig deep, learn, fail, and re-learn. You have a growth mindset.

My prayer is that you keep pouring. You go before us, and we are learning. As we learn, we are also pouring into others. Your platform is bringing light to those who need it. It has a greater impact than you imagine.

The 8 topics that follow are my “Daily 5” and 3 other topics I am currently working on creating healthy habits for growth.

* Time with Jesus

* Cleaning and Organization

* Health and Wellness

* Education of my interests

* Self-development

* Exercise

* Connecting

If you’d like to learn more about creating your daily 5- follow John Maxwell’s website. He has a book that addresses this concept.

**This is not an ad, I do not get compensation from sharing John Maxwell’s website. He is one of many resources I’ve had the opportunity to learn from.

One Thing.

Posted on by rootedmama

I am a dreamer.

I get an idea- and I dream it up, bigger and bigger, until its this massive idea that is overwhelming.

And then. I freeze.

I freeze from being overwhelmed.

I freeze out of fear.

Have you been there?

It’s…frustrating. It’s terrifying.

My family can not live off of dreams.

I also have faith and hope. I have faith and hope that these big dreams are going to work out. And little by little, they do. But, that BIG, MASSIVE, breakthrough that I am searching for. It hasn’t come to fruition, YET.

I say yet, because my God is big.

He is bigger than I can ever imagine.

I keep putting Him in a box.

And He keeps reminding me that…

1. He doesn’t belong in a box

2. And even if He did- He’s much bigger than a box

I believe that God moves in BIG ways. But, He can’t move, if we don’t have action.

So, when we are overwhelmed with “God, I don’t even know what I am supposed to do anymore?” “What do I do?”

Just do one thing.

What is the ONE thing you can do right now?

What’s the one thing you can do right now- it’s that little thing that will help you breathe easier.

You got it?

Wait, wait, wait. Don’t make it complicated. Quit overthinking it. Don’t let your thoughts run wild…go back to it.

What’s that one thing? Hold on to it. Focus on it. Start it. Complete it. That’s it.

Ready?

Great. Let’s go get it done.

Breathe

Posted on by rootedmama

Anxiety and depression. The darkness that these two are can be hard to explain to someone who hasn’t lived them on a daily basis.

They over take your life and your mind.

They can be…

-what it looks like to take every ounce of energy- just to get out of bed.

-your body constantly trembling from the inside, out.

-every noise and touch being over stimulating.

-negative thoughts in and out, controlling your mind. All. Day.

-holding onto the past, and fear of the future.

If you are reading this right now, and you are in that place. Like, deep, dark, in that place. I want you to know that there is hope. With help and tools, you can overcome. You can see the light again, or even for the first time.

Are you living life minute by minute? Wake up, shower, eat, go to work, eat supper, sleep. Repeat?

Many people I know have dealt with this. I have dealt with this. So, don’t give up- ok? Keep pushing through. Day by day. Do what you can, and do your best.

If you are in over your head. Like, there is no hope left. Get help. Tell a trusted friend, family member, co-worker, mentor.

Then, seek help from someone who is trained.

Because, although telling that friend is a great relief for you…the other side of that is that now they may be worried about you. And it is not their job, no matter how good of a friend they are, to make you better or to fix you. They can be a good friend, and not know how to help you. They can sit with you, and tell you how much it sucks….

But making things better- that’s up to you. You have to do that. You have to be able to choose to make steps towards feeling better. You have to find the help-again, from someone who is trained. And you can! And it does get better!! I’m here to tell you!

And in this process….

Look for ways to find life.

What do you love to do?

What brings you joy?

You might even ask: What do people do for fun? What do people do to fill themselves up? And the next thought might come: I don’t even remember what fun looks like, anymore.

Here’s what you do. Are you ready?

Find a quiet place. You can close your eyes. Or just sit in silence. Maybe you have some worship music playing ever so quietly in the background. Take some deep breaths to calm yourself. When your mind starts to calm…..and thoughts start to come back into your mind…no, not that one..that one was negative..push it away. Rebuke it.

There it is. That one. Maybe you were thinking….”it’d be nice if I could just _________ right now”. Was it take a shower? Go on a walk? Read a book?

Now. Go do that one thing. Are you at work? That’s ok. Take a break, for a min. Obviously, you don’t need to take advantage of your employer. Be respectful in how you go about taking your break. But, if you’re feeling like you need to be able to breathe. Listen to your body. It’s telling you something. It’s telling you that you need something more, or less, than what you’re putting yourself through right now.

And above all else, know that you are loved by someone that can love you like no one else can.

Mental Health Awareness Month

Posted on by rootedmama

May is Mental Health Awareness Month.

I want to be very clear- I’m not a mental health professional.

I am; however, someone who has continually worked through anxiety and depression.

Because of my journey with anxiety and depression, I’m a big believer in sharing experiences. I believe that sharing experiences can be a source of healing to the person “going through it”. In my opinion, it can help to hear stories from those who have gone before you. I know, because it’s one of the things that helped me on my journey.

One of the many sayings I’ve heard over and over was: I wish I knew, then, that other people went through x,y,z.

Thankfully, talking about Mental Health is becoming more and more accepted.

This month, I’d like to share and re-share my journey.

I’d love to share resources.

I’d love to share hope.

If you or someone you know battles with Mental Health, know that you are loved. You are not alone.

Please visit https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/find-help/ if you need resources.