Begin, Again

These last couple of years, I let go of “Words for the Year”. Those statements and values to help you decide what kind of life you’re going to live that year. . . Typically, at the beginning of a New Year.

I felt like something different was needed. Looking back, maybe there was a word/phrase that I lived by. But, I definitely didn’t give it a “stamp of approval”. I kind of, just did it.

Looking back, I’d say my phrase for the last two years has been: “Just Be”. That looked like loving myself and loving the moment I’m at, finding a space to accept ‘what is’, and just living in the moment. Not forcing anything, and letting life just happen.

As we have been inching closer to the end of the year, I have felt like I wanted words to live by this year. But, I didn’t want to force it. So, I waited on God.

And today, it hit me. I felt a small whisper.

Begin, again. Outdoors More. Intentional.

And while, I have a feeling that I know what that means. . . I’m going to incorporate these words to live by, with what I have learned over the past few years.

Begin, again. Outdoors more. Intentional.

While I’m living life this way- I’ll also “Just Be” and allow life to happen in the moment.

Amidst the Chaos

The older I get, the more I learn about myself. Like, I need structure, but also a freeing amount of flexibility.

Enough structure to not feel suffocated, and also enough flexibility to not live in utter chaos.

And sometimes, in life. . . Everything feels like utter chaos. No matter how much of a balance or idea of “the plan” that I think I have in control.

And it’s in that moment, that I realize whom my life depends on. That I need God, because if I do not have Him, anxiety and fear would control the type of life I live.

It’s amidst the chaotic moments in life that I’m reminded to stay connected to Him- day-in-and-day-out. Having a solid foundation in Him when life gets rocky, it’s what keeps me connected, grounded, and He’s what keeps me going. I would completely fall apart if it wasn’t for Him!

Anxiously Waiting

I’ve spent a lot of time, these last few years just waiting. Waiting on God.

In some instances, in the waiting, I have felt like I couldn’t trust God any more. I have felt hurt. I have felt left behind. I’ve even been plain mad at God. And this past week, I have felt the most anxious I have felt in a very long time.

A lot of things don’t make sense.

I can’t even count any more, how many times, since 2020 that I’ve said: Life just doesn’t make sense right now.

But there are some things, that I am confident of:

* I’m confident that whatever you’re going through, you are not alone and you are loved. There are sooo many people out there sharing their stories. They share their stories, for many reasons. Know that one of those reasons, are so that you and I know that we are not in this life and journey alone. And you are loved. There is a tribe out there that loves you, even if you haven’t found them yet. There is a person out there that loves you more than anyone ever could. And He will leave the 99 to come find you!

*I’m confident that while the waiting sucks, there’s a purpose. And then waiting is painful sometimes, but God can use that pain. He can use that pain to help other people. You can (although not always) use what comes from that pain, on the other side of that pain, and sometimes even in that pain to be the hands and feet of Jesus.

*This one is hard for me to say, right now…but, I know it as a truth- because God’s word is true, and because I’ve seen Him work over and over and over again. I’ve seen it happen in my life, in my friends’ lives, and in complete stranger’s lives. All of that to say: God’s plan and timing is perfect. It’s better than anything you or I could ever dream. And, while I know this to be true…it’s a truth that I’m struggling to hold onto, at this moment.

Honestly, I could keep going on. But, please know, this last week of the year…If you are still waiting on God for His perfect timing, if you are feeling alone, if the pain is too much to bare, right now. He is the light in the dark. He loves you more than you could imagine. I know it’s hard, right now…but, keep holding on!